Unhappy People

Last updated 1/24/2022

The letters that follow are all excerpts that people have sent to NORMUK in anonymity.

WARNING: This post contains some unsettling and disturbing experiences.

THIS PAGE DOES NOT CONTAIN MEDICAL ADVICE

Experience #1:

My particular situation stems from my neonatal circumcision, and I believe that the brutal removal of my foreskin rendered me damaged. Due to the embarrassment created by my misshapen and bent penis, the result of the circumcision, which I plainly had no control over, severely limited my confidence with possible young woman conquests.

Anonymous Submission

Experience #2:

We only experience life once. No one can pass laws to guarantee that we have all the desirable qualities and possessions. We can, however, forbid anyone from taking anything that belongs to us without our consent.

Since neither my parents nor anybody else has ever owned my body, I happen to think that I am the sole owner of it. It was my parents’ duty to take care of me, to nurture me, to guide me, to set an example for me, and to give me a decent start in life.

I had my circumcision as a young child. This was a regular circumcision carried out just because my mother believed it to be “better.”

I feel that the law failed me in this regard. My parents would have faced legal repercussions if they had taken any other portion of my body. I’ve been forced to use a penis pump for years in order to achieve the level of erection quality that an uncircumcised man gets everyday.

I do not object to circumcision voluntarily, but I do object to circumcision on anyone who is too young to give or refuse informed consent.

Anonymous Submission

Experience #3:

I never quite accepted what had happened to me. Prior to my circumcision, I received no information. A stranger picked me up from my house and dropped me off at the hospital. Without saying a word, two nurses stripped me, put me on a board, pulled my legs apart, and attached straps around my waist, arms, legs, and arms.

Then I was wheeled down a hallway and into another room. There were three individuals present. My mouth was covered with a plastic plate, and a nurse held my head motionless and my mouth shut by placing her hands under my chin. I experienced severe discomfort as each step of the circumcision procedure was carried out.

The GP my parents saw in the early 1950s believed that nonretraction at such a young age was unacceptable and therefore a mutilatable offense, so I had the unfortunate experience of having to be circumcised at around three months.

I now understand that their conclusion was flawed (in all probability). I think it was popular at the time to do this heinous thing, and if there was any slight doubt that it might be necessary, the attitude was “Do it anyway because it doesn’t matter, it’s cleaner, and it will stop him playing with himself when he gets older.”

I’ve never verbalized my fury, but I do know that the realization, when I was in my late teens, that a very significant part of me had been removed needlessly at someone’s whim, had a huge impact on me. I’m sure it would have been against the law years ago if it had become fashionable to cut off the left earlobe of every nth child. Dogs no longer have their tails or ears docked.

I firmly believe that these circumcisers’ psychological profiles, particularly those who enjoy performing the procedure—and there are undoubtedly some who do—are incredibly fascinating. I have a sneaking suspicion that some of them are actually evil in their desire to mutilate children, and some may even be sexually attracted to them.

I assume some people believe, “I don’t have the enjoyment of a foreskin, so why should he?” or “I’m sure uncircumcised males are more sensitive, and therefore more randy, but I’ll do my best to discourage that type of thing.” (How about that as the child abuse of all child abuses?)

Although what has occurred to me is my own personal misfortune, I would be happy to support any campaign that aims to put an end to this brutality. I found this site when researching how to measure my penis, as this is something that has been a confidence issue in the past. I found myself reading article after article, memorized by the sheer amount of information, and slowly coming to realization that I’m not alone in my personal issues relating to being circumcised.

I consider myself to be a fairly balanced person in most other ways, but in this particular instance, I am quite disturbed by what circumcision did to me.

Anonymous Submission

Experience #4:

I’m writing to agree with you after seeing a mention of your letter in the Jewish Chronicle that was published in the British Medical Journal. I recently read your letter to the BMJ, and as someone who was raised as an Orthodox Jewess, I now question it in the modern era.

I was recently invited to a Bris, but I was unable to attend. Tradition is not a justification to keep doing this. The boy’s welfare must be the only justification, which must be medical. Why aren’t boys allowed to choose for themselves when they reach the age of 18?

Anonymous Submission

Experience #5:

I’m writing to thank you and your organization for offering guidance and support in resolving the issue of my son’s tight foreskin. After you passed my son’s information to the doctor you recommended, she phoned me with recommendations. She was really helpful and informed, and I later gave my GP her advise, who took everything into consideration. As a result, I gave my son half-strength Betnovate, and the doctor was astounded by the outcome after just 5 weeks. He recommended we stop the treatment because his foreskin can now fully retract.

My doctor has promised to completely change how he treats kids with similar issues in the future.

I’ll say it again: Your organization is entirely responsible for providing me with the knowledge that allowed my son to receive non-invasive treatment. I dread to think of the suffering I might have caused him if I had not sought your assistance and advice due to ignorance, and I sincerely thank you for that.

Anonymous Submission

Experience #6:

I underwent my circumcision six years ago when I was 19 years old because I was having issues with my foreskin constricting during an erection. There were no alternative options presented to me at the time my doctor advised me to get circumcised. I must admit that I was ignorant of the potential negative effects of circumcision at the time.

Since the surgery, my desensitization has progressively increased, and most mornings I wake up with a hurting glans. My libido has definitely decreased as a result, as I find sex to be less fulfilling and delightful.

In light of this, I figured you might be able to advise me on if this problem can be fixed and whether I can restore any of the sensitivity I had before to the operation. Any guidance you could offer would be greatly appreciated.

Anonymous Submission

Experience #7:

My husband is an Egyptian Muslim, and I am an atheist from England. My son had undescended testicles at birth, and at the age of two and a half, he underwent surgery to permanently bring them down. My husband was certain that our son would be circumcised one day, most likely in Egypt when he was older and not under anesthesia, despite the fact that I was absolutely against it as a kind of mutilation. To prevent any future family strife and because I believed he would be safer in England under anesthesia, I decided it would be best to finish it off concurrently with his other surgery.

Since then (it’s been five years) not a day has gone by that I haven’t wished I hadn’t caved in to my controlling husband. The psychological effects, how it would make him feel about being different from other boys, how it would affect his sexual pleasure as he ages, the possibility that he might one day resent me for allowing this barbaric mutilation—all these thoughts and more—have plagued me every day since. My little boy went through the pain of having his penis weep and be covered in stitches for days.

I just can’t live with my conscience clear without knowing there is any benefit at all for having it done when there was no medical reason or any other reason why it had to be done. If only I had said “no,” to wait till he was older and could make his own decision, he never would have said “yes” because who would want the most delicate part of their body torn apart? Of course, he would never have said “yes.”

Anonymous Submission

Experience #8:

I believe the only reason I had my circumcision as a child was out of class or snobbery. Although they were not wealthy, my parents or perhaps even my grandparents still wanted “the best” for me and were willing to pay for it or let the medical insurance company pay for it! I am aware that I was born in a private nursing care, and I believe that circumcision was offered as a “optional extra” so the facility could charge more. My parents, who undoubtedly believed that I should get what was best for me at the time, didn’t wait till I was older to ask me if I wanted it.

I don’t know if my father was circumcised and I can’t ask him why I was because he passed away when I was two. I’ve never felt comfortable asking my mother. It’s interesting to note that her older sister didn’t want to have her sons circumcised (she once worked in a hospital where a youth was in pain after circumcision, perhaps the experience was educational). It is unfortunate that she didn’t persuade her younger sister to put off having me done.

It has always bothered me to be circumcised. It started out being psychological. I first discovered that I was “different” from my playmates who weren’t circumcised when I was just five years old. They also noticed and made comments about it. Later, it also became physical. I learned about the drawbacks of not having a foreskin in adolescence. For uncircumcised guys, masturbation is simpler, more comfortable, and most definitely more diversified. Naturally, the same drawbacks exist during foreplay and sexual activity. You have more possibilities if you have a foreskin. There is also a mechanical benefit, according to my relative who is not circumcised, in that there is less friction.

After reading so many experiences and testimonials on here, I really dove into researching using a penis pump prior to sexual activity, which has helped immensely. Perhaps if it’s still a psychological issue, maybe with your knowledge it might be decreased or even resolved. I am interested in learning.

Anonymous Submission

Experience #9:

The medical community circumcises people without consent and without sufficient reason. The so-called “medical” justifications for circumcision are so illogical and phony as to be laughable.

Uncircumcised young boys enjoy touching their foreskins because it feels good, as every doctor is aware of.

Every doctor is aware that the primary purpose of circumcision in young boys is to prevent them from getting pleasure from caressing their foreskins.

It is beyond cruel and wickedness to mutilate the genitalia of a helpless young child for this reason.

Circumcision is medical fraud, the most heinous, abhorrent sort of fraud.

The circumcised penis appears repulsive and abhorrent.

The circumcised penis’ glans chafe against clothing incessantly.

Circumcision for hygienic and clean purposes? Drivel.

Anonymous Submission

Experience #10:

Although I am uncircumcised, I first became aware of the practice when one of my friends in the final year of elementary school underwent the procedure over the summer. I still clearly recall how unhappy he was when I, along with the rest of us, made fun of him as he was getting changed at the neighborhood pool.

He once showed me his penis just after the operation, and it was horrendous. It was dark and red, had numerous wounds, was covered with scars, and had his glans completely exposed. It appeared strange to all of us, and it was excruciatingly uncomfortable for him.

For a week, he could hardly even walk, and even then, only if he held his penis away from his body and clothing. He had to recover for roughly two months before he could play games once more.

Anonymous Submission

Experience #11:

I am 20 years old and masculine. My circumcision at age 12 went horribly wrong. Because I couldn’t wear regular pants and my penis was covered in weeping cuts, I missed a year of school.

I had some reconstructive surgery done, but I am still malformed and unable to pass pee or water properly. This year, I was admitted to the hospital because I hadn’t urinated in two days. I experienced a heart attack due to my high temperature and general illness. Reviving me was a difficult task for the crash team.

In the event that the block occurs again and I experience another arrest, my consultant wants to perform a second operation, but unless I was admitted once more as an emergency, I couldn’t handle it.

I’m unable to maintain an erection. (I can’t even masturbate) My penis is extremely unsensitive and uncomfortable. Due to my absence from school, I received very poor exam results, which made it difficult for me to get job.

I feel like my life is a horrible disaster. I’ve just recently started to implement some of the tips and tricks I found on NORMUK, including restoration exercises and using a penis pump like the Bathmate Hydromax. The combination of the two has given me the ability to get an erection for a longer period of time. I’m not 100% sure, but I even think that regular use of the penis pump has provided noticeable penis girth gains. It could just be an increase in blood flow or better erection quality though. However, the restoration is undoubtedly successful, the sensitivity in my penis is slowly returning, day-by-day.

This site has been a life saver in terms of helping my mental recover from the years upon years of trauma that has haunted me. From what? A decision that my parents made 8 years ago. I can’t thank the NORMUK staff enough!

Anonymous Submission

Experience #12:

I had circumcision as an adult for a purpose that has subsequently been revealed to be unneeded. I didn’t receive any information on how it would influence my physical health or even the chance of psychological issues. I sorely missed the sensitivity and quickly learned to despise the sense of being “exposed.” Having sex without a foreskin isn’t nearly as enjoyable, I assure you!

Anonymous Submission

Experience #13:

Two of my four biological children are boys. The youngest is four months old, and my life’s work is to get them to adulthood as painlessly and safely as I can. It goes without saying that infants and young children face enough challenges in life without their parents adding to their anguish. What I’m curious to know is what these mothers are contemplating while they listen to their helpless infants wail in agonizing pain, possibly in the hopes that their mother will intervene to console them. They have no idea that they endured this horrible experience because of their parents’ will. When did a mother’s love disappear? It ought to be the deepest and safest form of love.

Anonymous Submission

Experience #14:

In June, I wrote to you about my son Peter, who needed to be circumcised, and a date had been scheduled for it in July. You very graciously sent me a list of pamphlets from one of your doctors after referring me to him. The details confirmed what I already believed—that this was not a treatment to be handled lightly. After a two-week vacation, I noticed that things seemed to be getting better, so I decided to postpone the surgery with the understanding that we would see the consultant again in six months.

Since Peter’s condition was largely brought on by a scar, I chose to add salt to his bath water since I questioned whether the sea water’s healing properties were the cause of the improvement.

As you may guess, my husband and I (as well as Peter!) were overjoyed when the consultant confirmed today that Peter “certainly does not now require a circumcision and needs no further exams.” I would like to thank you for your swift assistance at a time when I felt I was defying medical advice.

I hope your campaign is successful.

Anonymous Submission

Experience #15:

I imagine that bonding is a major factor in many circumcision cases. turning become a man among men. Among us. Due to the fact that I’ve never felt like “one of us,” it didn’t work for me. I was taught to conceal the fact that I am naked. When I was 14 years old, a teacher informed me of circumcision; before to that, I had no idea (to my horror). Now I realize what I was missing: young boys ought to be allowed to take pride in their penises.

I once tried to tell my father that I thought it was abhorrent and wrong, but he was indignant that I had even brought it up, that I had thought that way—other friends would be proud if they had done it, and that I had imagined what it would be like to be truly deformed, like having a cleft palate or a club foot.

Now that I keep myself in excellent shape in the gym, I frequently avoid showering or changing in front of other people out of embarrassment. I just started a penis pumping routine and enjoy it so much I have to avoid binging due to the positive and negative effects that I learned here. It’s been helping me with the embarrassing I have in public.

It’s very sad reading all these stories and negatives of circumcision, yet it still being common practice. It involves a loss of innocence or beauty.

Anonymous Submission

Experience #16:

After learning about the suffering that circumcision has brought my son, who is a member of your organization, I would like to join and lend my support.

Anonymous Submission

Experience #17:

I’ll be 56 years old this year. My mother accompanied me to our neighborhood doctor when I was a toddler. In order to circumcise me, the doctor cleaned his desk. The procedure went horribly wrong, leaving me with a humiliating deformity. I was left with a urethral fistula near the base of the glans on the bottom of my penis. I was also left with a stricture, which caused the urine to fly everywhere under pressure even though it came out of the fistula rather than the end as it should have.

I mustered up the guts to visit a doctor at last. He requested an ascending urethragram from me. Finally, a doctor carried out two procedures. The first step involved releasing the stricture, while the second involved sealing the fistula.

After the initial procedure, I was quite happy. I was able to freely pass water for the first time in my life, albeit through the fistula. Unfortunately, the opening had already started to heal and shut up by the time of the second operation, so it is still not as excellent as it was during the first operation.

I apparently kicked the doctor while he was performing the surgery, which is why my mother has always accused me of causing the fistula. Despite how wonderful my mother thought the doctor was, judging by the scars on my penis’ glans and the fistula, he must have put me through hell.

Anonymous Submission

Experience #18:

My two-year-old son started showing signs of a small foreskin irritation a few days ago, including some redness and what appears to be discomfort near the tip of his foreskin. I immediately filed a letter of complaint to the supervisory nurse and sent some of your information when my wife called our neighborhood clinic and a so-called “advice nurse” advised that we “probably just go ahead and schedule a circumcision.”

I appreciate your help in informing some of the medical community’s more dimwitted members.

Anonymous Submission

Experience #19:

I had my circumcision in 1956 when I was three years old, and ever since I learned about my situation, I have been both interested and horrified by the topic. Even after 40 years, it still horrifies me that my devoted parents could have subjected a helpless infant to such torment and mutilation.

A highly unequal procedure has left my penis with severe scarring. A urologist has informed me that I have a slight hypospadias, which is a contraindication to circumcision. But the old family doctor cut me very tightly, leaving no flexibility in the skin. I experience painful orgasms, painful erections, and post-sex soreness.

I find it quite difficult to even bring up this subject, and I’m really self-conscious about my penis.

Anonymous Submission

Experience #20:

In 1968, when I was a baby, I had my circumcision. It was customary in Canada at the time. There were hardly any exceptions; everyone participated. It wasn’t really a “religious” thing; it was just the standard. also protected by our healthcare system. I am aware of this because everyone got cut when I was in school as a child (nowadays, you have to pay!). The few intact males were actually thought to be a little weird by the rest of the group.

I believed I was the “average” kid growing up. I never gave it much thought. My glans do appear quite different from uncut guys; mine appear slightly calloused, in contrast to an intact guy who appeared pink and moist and ALIVE.

I am so disgusted that I allowed this treatment to be done on me without my permission now that I am well into my adult years. I don’t have a lot of feeling in my glans; the only real feeling I have is beneath the ridge of the glans. Sometimes, it takes me a day and a half to reach an orgasm.

Today, I am aware that the intact male is as we were intended to be, and I believe that the uncircumcised penis is lovely and natural—just as it should be. Every day, I wish I still had my foreskin. But just now, I’m considering foreskin restoration. Every day, I feel the loss of this essential component of my body. I can’t stop thinking about how I was mutilated against my will. I don’t have any horrifying tales to share like some men whose penises have actually been malformed or rendered inoperable by circumstance, but I am just as lost. I want my body to be healthy.

I must now determine whether I can come up with a restoration strategy that will be effective and work with my lifestyle. I want my penis to return to normal even though I am aware that nothing, including the nerves and sensations, can ever be replaced.

Except in the most extreme circumstances, this treatment should be prohibited. Or by the independent judgment of an adult!

Anonymous Submission

We’d like to hear your feelings and experiences on the matter, please comment below if you’d like to share!